Orville Highpockets Jarrett found himself standing before the Pearly Gates of Heaven. 

Saint Peter stared uneasily at him through the golden bars and was just about ready to press the "Enter" button to let him in, when it hit him! "What the hell is that smell?" Saint Peter cried out. Then he quickly pressed the "Reject" button which sent poor Orville straight to the pits of hell.

The Lord of Flies was making his rounds when he stumbled upon the dejected war hero from Loose Screws, West Virginia. He took a good whiff and then bellowed out: "Oh, hell, no! You're not coming down here and funk-up my crib!" Old Beezelbub went straight to his hot line (the Red Phone) and dialed 1-800-GOD. After an hour of bickering back and forth, the rulers of Good and Evil agreed that Old Orville still had plenty of life left on Earth. And they sent him back to, of all places, Bollywood, India!

Orville had finally made the Big Time at last. He was given a small part on CW's Supernatural television show, which had recently moved its operations from Hollywood to Bollywood to save on the costs of production. The episode he was to star in was titled: "The Man Who Would be King of Loose Screws, West Virginia."  But, after working several days with Orville on the set, the Winchester brothers, Sam and Dean, went to the show's creator, the great Eric Kripe, and asked him to please change the title of this episode to: "The Man Who Smelled So Funky that He Was Thrown Out of Heaven and Hell." Mr. Kripe granted them their wish. 

And the story of Orville Highpockets Jarrett will live on for another day.

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A Note from the Author: I would like to take this time to dedicate this little story to all of my homies named Orville. I've come to believe that there's a little Orville in all of us. Haven't you ever been riding down the highway with the windows open on a hot summer's dog-day afternoon, and you catch a whiff of something that gives you the urge to check your underarm deodorant? And you say: "What the hell is that smell?"

The End

Another Orville story will appear soon. Thanks for dropping by!